to  take  revenge. Replacements  joined them from
every direction and  we  were  sorely  pressed,  particularly  since  eighty
percent of the population were partisans of the Reds.
     Civil  war  is the ultimate horror.  I  was in  a  battalion  that  was
directed  against my  own  stanitza. When  I heard the cannons,  I knew they
might be killing my loved ones or destroying my home. And there was terrible
savagery and  ferocity on both  sides.  When  at last I saw my family again,
they told me that the grocer's two sons, with whom  I had played as a child,
had enlisted  in the Red Army and had sworn to cut me to ribbons  if I  fell
into their hands.
     That war was full of ironies. There was a rich mujik, a man who owned a
hundred  and  twenty-five acres, had  more  than twenty horses,  and  thirty
cattle and much other livestock, in our town. Yet his three sons immediately
joined the Reds.  One of his  neighbors, also a  mujik, who lived  by making
Russian ovens, had a wife and seven children, and was as poor as Job. Yet he
joined  our detachment and fought  the  entire  war  in the famous  Kornilov
regiment.
     Several times during this period my life was spared against all odds. I
left  my  machine gunner's section to join the  cavalry. My  grandfather had
served Czars Alexander II,  Alexander III and Nicholas II and had retired in
1907 as a general. After his retirement, he had raised horses and had taught
me from the age of two all the skills of a horseman. So, when it was decided
to create a sotnia  (mounted section), I was named first officer. I bought a
horse from a former  Cossack  commander, a  beautiful animal  but  with  two
faults: he was unwilling  to follow other  I horses, being used  to the lead
position, and he was shot from under me.
     After the capture of my  stanitza,  my commander told  me to go back to
Ekaterinodar for a few days and not to stay where everyone  knew me. "If the
Reds retake the stanitza," he said, "your relatives may pay dearly for you."
     With  my orderly, I started  back to  Ekaterinodar,  about  fifty miles
away. That  evening  I arrived at a  convent of nuns located halfway between
the  stations of  Platnirov-skaya and PIatunovskaya. I knew  the place  very
well. The mother superior, a  venerable old lady, had been a great friend of
my  grandfather.  She  told  me  that the  Reds  were burning down  all  the
convents. There  was a small Cossack detachment there,  about  forty men, on
their way to Ekaterinodar to join the  fight, commanded by the sublieutenant
Kedrovsky, whom I knew so well.
     Like many Russian convents, this one was by a high wall and resembled a
fortress. My horse had lost a shoe and I sent my orderly  to take him to the
stanitza  about three miles  away to  be reshod.  When  he left, the massive
single gate to the convent was barred and sentinels  were placed at the gate
and in the bell tower. The front lines were shifting constantly, so that one
could expect  a  Red band  at  any time. After dinner,  the mother  superior
escorted me to the guest room,  while the sublieutenant and his men remained
below.
     I was sound asleep when firing broke out. A nun woke me at  i A.M.  The
Reds had surrounded the convent and Kedrovsky was seriously wounded.
     The Cossacks were firing back from the bell towers but we were short of
ammunition.  Kedrovsky had been carried into the chapel and I could see that
he did not have much time left.
     "We are done for," he whispered. "There are too many of them. They have
two  cannons and  we  only  have  twenty-five cartridges  apiece.  Hide. The
Cossack troops may be able to save themselves somehow, but for you and me it
is certain death. You know  how these pigs torture officers. Don't fall into
their hands alive."
     A  Cossack  dagger  and  the  nine-millimeter  Colt I  had  received in
military school were the only weapons I had. The Red cannons were bombarding
the convent and shrapnel  was falling everywhere.  I left Kedrovsky and went
back to the courtyard.
     "We can't hold  out much longer," a noncommissioned officer told me. "I
am going to talk to  them. They have promised not to kill us if we open  the
gate. They don't know you're here. Hide somewhere and no Cossack will betray
you."
     But where? Surely the Reds would ransack the convent from top to bottom
and I would be discovered. I was nineteen, not ready to die. To be killed in
battle  was  one  thing,  but  to  kill  myself  or  die  under  torture was
unthinkable.
     I shook hands with the sergeant. Kedrovsky had died. The terrified nuns
were hiding in the  cellars. "I have a place  that  nobody knows about," the
mother superior told me. "My  poor  daughters are  so  frightened they might
betray you out of fear. You will be safe if the Reds don't stay too long."
     She took me  to  a dark  corner of the main church, where there  were a
number of icons. One icon  was very large  and so old that  nobody knew what
saint it represented. The mother superior pressed something at its base, and
then drew the icon aside. There was a small cubbyhole
     J
     where I  could  just squeeze in. "They won't  find you here," she said.
"I'll come back when the danger is over. Don't move, and don't smoke."
     She  moved the icon back in place and  I was left in the  darkness with
only the air that filtered through a small crack in the wall. For a  while I
listened to the  artillery and  rifles. It was silent  for a  brief  moment.
Then,  shots  and wild  screaming.  Afterward, I learned that  the Reds  had
massacred all the Cossacks. Only one, a fellow my own age, had been  rescued
by the sister-cook, who had hidden him in a dish closet.
     The Reds were  searching  for  convent treasure. I  heard them approach
with the mother superior. They were warning her that thev  would kill her if
she didn't  tell them where  it was.  They  were so close that I  could hear
their swearwords  and their heavy, drunken breathing. They looted the church
for about a half hour. In  spite of the cold and my cramped quarters, I fell
asleep.
     I  was  wakened by  someone shaking me and  I thought the end had come.
When I opened my  eyes,  I  saw some officers  and Cossacks, with the mother
superior. "Come out of  your hole, friend," said a  captain I did not  know.
"And thank  the mother  superior for  saving your life. Everybody  else  was
slaughtered."
     I was so stiff  I could hardly  walk.  By  the time  they got me to the
courtyard I saw one  of the Cossack detachments from Ekaterinodar. About two
hundred Red  soldiers  had captured the  convent as  they had been returning
from a village where they had looted a State vodka factory. Dead drunk, they
had been on their way to  the railroad station, where another Red detachment
was quartered, when they had come upon the convent and heard that there were
Cossacks inside.
     While  I  had slept, the  situation had  reversed.  Exhausted from  the
fighting and  drunk on the mass wine  they  had  looted  at the convent, the
soldiers,  even the sentinels, had fallen asleep.  The  Cossacks in a nearby
stanitza had managed to alert  a  detachment  on its way to  the  front. The
battle was short and the Reds were wiped out. Only twenty were left alive to
bury  the dead, and then  they  were shot. That was  what  the Civil War was
like.
     My  orderly   returned  with  my  horse,   and  I  set  out  again  for
Ekaterinodar.
     Despite some victories,  our  resistance was  doomed. There were just a
few of us, and  masses  of  Reds  were arriving from all  sides.  We had  no
reserve ammunition, while the Reds had the  leftover reserves of the Russian
army at the front.
     The noose was  tightening  around Ekaterinodar. Our superiors  -- Ataman
Filimonov,  Colonel Pokrovsky and some generals from the front -- decided the
only way to escape being annihilated was to retreat to the mountains  to the
south on the Black Sea. I don't  think  they had  anv idea  of how we  would
survive in the mountains  or where we would  find food for thousands of men.
How would we defend  ourselves? It was  a desperate decision but it was  our
only choice. The situation became more critical  as hordes of  civilians and
retired officers who  were afraid  of  falling  into the hands of  the  Reds
followed us.
     In February 1918 we left our beloved city only to run  immediately into
a  line of Bolshevik troops. After  a few days of fighting, we were sure the
end had  come  for us.  Everyone was put  into  the  front lines,  even  the
civilians and the  old men. But toward  the evening of the third day somehow
we broke through. My mounted detachment had the responsibility of protecting
headquarters from a surprise attack.
     A  horseman galloped out  of  the woods, leaped from his  horse  before
Ataman Filimonov, and threw  his arms around him shouting, "Kornil, Kornil."
He was one of our Cherkess  allies and had brought us unexpected  good news.
General Kornilov and  his tiny army were just eighteen  miles  away. We  had
thought he was still in Rostov-on-the-Don,  but he  too had  evacuated under
pressure. He had hoped to join us and wait for better times -- for the moment
when the Cossacks,  who were observing strict neutrality  (ninety percent of
our men  were ex-officers), would understand what real threat the Bolsheviks
were to their whole way of life.
     Pokrovsky was  scheduled to  meet  Kornilov the next day  but Pokrovsky
himself had only been named  major-general the  evening before by Filimonov.
This was bound to offend Kornilov and the other generals. Filimonov did not,
in their view, have  the right to make appointments. Now he had acted as the
head of an independent state, and this could only add to the tension between
the Cossacks and the  Russians. Pokrovsky, because he was not a Cossack, was
denied a role in the joined armies.
     The  meeting of  our two small troops  under Kornilov's command was  to
take place in the stanitza  of  Novy-Dmitrievskaya. We hoped to persuade the
Cossacks to  rise,  so  we thought it  essential  to retake  their  capital,
Ekaterinodar.  So, at the beginning of March, our army was once again before
the city. Ekaterinodar was defended by ten times our strength, and fortified
by heavy artillery against our measly  ten cannons and two thousand  shells.
Even  so, we might have taken it  if General Kornilov had not been  hit by a
shell.  His death was a terrible blow. It overturned all our plans. He was a
Cossack general  and immensely  popular. If  we  had taken Ekaterinodar,  he
could  have  rallied all the  Cossacks  of  Kuban,  the Don  and Terek.  His
successor, General  Denikine,  did  not have  the same relationship with the
men. In  any  case, he decided  to  raise  the siege and  to move us to  the
territory of the Don Cossacks where, it was rumored, the Cossack contingents
had begun to converge.
     We went  through a village  called, in  Russian, "The Colonies." It was
where the Germans  who  had  been  transplanted to Russia under Catherine II
lived. With elaborate security, we buried Kornilov. (The next day  the  Reds
discovered  his  grave   and  dragged  his  body  through   the  streets  of
Ekaterinodar.) had  hoped to join us and wait  for better  times --  for  the
moment  when  the  Cossacks,  who  were  observing strict neutrality (ninety
percent of  our men were ex-officers), would understand what real threat the
Bolsheviks were to their whole way of life.
     Pokrovsky was scheduled  to meet Kornilov  the  next  day but Pokrovsky
himself had only been named  major-general the evening before by  Filimonov.
This was bound to offend Kornilov and the other generals. Filimonov did not,
in their view, have the  right to make appointments. Now he had acted as the
head of an independent state, and this could only add to the tension between
the Cossacks and the Russians. Pokrovsky,  because he was not a Cossack, was
denied a role in the joined armies.
     The  meeting of  our two small troops under Kornilov's  command was  to
take  place in the stanitza of Novy-Dmitrievskaya.  We hoped to persuade the
Cossacks to  rise, so  we  thought  it  essential to retake  their  capital,
Ekaterinodar. So, at the beginning  of March, our army was once again before
the city. Ekaterinodar was defended by ten times our strength, and fortified
by  heavy  artillery against our measly ten cannons and two thousand shells.
Even so,  we might have taken it if General  Kornilov had not  been hit by a
shell. His death was a terrible blow. It overturned all  our plans. He was a
Cossack  general  and immensely popular.  If  we had  taken Ekaterinodar, he
could have rallied  all  the Cossacks  of  Kuban,  the  Don  and Terek.  His
successor,  General Denikine, did  not have the  same  relationship with the
men.  In any  case, he  decided to raise the siege  and  to  move  us to the
territory of the Don Cossacks where, it was rumored, the Cossack contingents
had begun to converge.
     We went through a village called,  in Russian,  "The Colonies." It  was
where the Germans  who had  been transplanted  to Russia under  Catherine II
lived. With elaborate  security,  we buried Kornilov. (The next day the Reds
discovered  his  grave  and   dragged  his  body  through   the  streets  of
Ekaterinodar.)
        4. Discovery of Fear
     BY  NIGHT,  across  the  violent  winds of the  steppes of the northern
Caucasus, we marched toward the Don. Each evening as we would start out only
the general  staff  knew what  our route was to  be. Nevertheless,  the Reds
succeeded regularly  in  discovering  the  stanitzas  where we  halted,  and
bombarded us with artillery fire. We were so short  of guns and shells  that
we could not fire back  except in grave emergency. Our supply corps was  the
closest  Red  detachment; when our shells or cartridges ran dangerously low,
we raided them.
     I  took part in these expeditions  often. On the steppes of Kuban,  one
night, we were only a few miles from my village, where my mother and younger
brother still lived. I hadn't seen them for months,  and was frantic to know
if  they  were  all  right, but I  could  not  leave the column. I had  been
assigned to  be  General Markov's  liaison  with General  Denikine  for that
night.
     It was pitch dark, the clouds blotted out any trace of moonlight, and a
cutting wind blew  in our faces. We were wearing Cossack burkas, long, black
felt water- and wind-proof capes which served at night as  sleeping bags. We
marched eight miles north, then turned south to throw the Bolsheviks off our
trail.  We  had to cross the railroad  tracks, a movement which took several
hours and  was very dangerous since  the  Reds might  easily  telephone  our
position  to the  armored trains, who  could bombard us. To keep the  trains
from  getting  too close  to the column as  it crossed the  tracks, teams of
sappers would  blow up the tracks  a few  miles away on  both  sides of  our
lines.
     That  night  I was  following  General  Denikine's personal bodyguards.
Wrapped in my burka, I had laid the bridle  on the horse's neck and begun to
doze off. I was roused when my horse stopped. The column, two or three miles
long,  had halted  and everybody had  dismounted. We stretched our stiffened
limbs and  lay down,  covering our  heads  with our burkas. Next to me was a
kurgan,  one of the mounds on  which the Cossacks a century  before had  lit
their signal  fires to warn of  Cherkess attacks. I climbed one side of  the
kurmn to get out of the wind, attached the bridle to my leg to keep my horse
from wandering, and  fell asleep. After  a  while, the cold woke me. When  I
opened my eyes,  I leaped up. The column had disappeared. My horse,  grazing
on the fresh grass, had dragged me gradually down the kurgan.
     The wind  had died and the sky was cloudless. Overhead the  moon  shone
brilliantly; it was absolutely silent. I put my ear  to the ground to see if
I could pick up any  sound of the column and wagons. I could hear nothing. I
was quite alone in this vast, dangerous steppe.
     I was frozen with such  intense fear that I was  physically ill. I gave
my  horse his head in the  hopes he  would find his own way to our column. I
knew  the Red  cavalry would be  close  behind. He  didn't run, he flew. The
noise of his hooves resounded like thunder on the dry ground.
     After  about an  hour,  I saw a dark line against the gray  horizon. To
make less noise,  I rode along the side  of the road,  where  the earth  was
softer. After  a while,  I realized that the  dark line was a row  of  trees
planted along the railway tracks to protect them from snowdrifts. I knew the
road would lead to a crossing, but I  didn't know what might await me there,
so I turned to the right.
     When I  was five hundred  yards from the crossing, I thanked God that I
had  made a detour. Through the unbearable  silence  I  heard the sound of a
train slowly approaching. The armored train, I thought. I dismounted and led
my horse into the shadows of the trees. Apparently the Reds had repaired the
section of track  we  had blown up and were searching for the place where we
had crossed.
     The train had stopped at the crossing house, and I heard what I assumed
was  the Reds  interrogating the railroad guard. I could not distinguish the
words. The talking stopped but still the train did not move.
     It might stay there until dawn. It was already 3 A.M., so I didn't have
much time and the only safety lay  on the other  side of the tracks.  But to
cross I would have to  go through woods, down  along a  road that sank three
yards below  the surrounding ground. The other side was easier.  It was only
about a yard high,  no trouble for my horse. But I would  have to do  all of
this without the men on the train hearing me, and there was no wind to drown
out the noise.
     I pulled  off farther to the right, leading the horse by the bridle. He
was  used to  the front, so we  accomplished this easily.  Then he  saw  the
tracks glinting in the pale moonlight. I pulled  at him with all my strength
to get him to cross them. He was afraid of the slippery rails and  would not
budge. All this effort made a considerable amount of noise.
     I could  hear my heart beating,  and despite the cold I  was bathed  in
sweat. The only solution was to mount the horse, which might lessen his fear
and encourage his instinct  to obey his rider. I made the sign  of the cross
and leaped into the saddle and, for the first time ever, struck him with  my
crop. Surprised and  offended,  he made  such  a leap  that  he almost  fell
between  the tracks, and  I  had  difficulty keeping  my  mount.  Everything
happened  quickly. I found myself  half stunned,  lying against  a tree. The
horse was  standing  next to me trembling. I could hear the drops  of  sweat
falling from his body onto the ground. My face and hands were scratched from
the branches and I had an enormous bump on my head. My whole body hurt but I
didn't  have time to think.  The Reds must  certainly have  heard. I  forced
myself to my feet and led the horse through the woods.
     A few minutes later, I was on the steppe once again and relieved. I was
on the right side. I heard voices from the crossing and then the train began
to move. They were  searching  for the source of  the  noise.  I whipped the
horse with my crop and he leaped forward. Immediately, I heard the sound  of
machine gun fire aimed  in the wrong direction. But now  the Reds heard  the
hoof  beats on the dry  ground. They couldn't  get me with  a machine gun so
they  fired  a dozen cannon shells.  All  fell short, except one that landed
about two yards to my left.
     I galloped God knows where for  about twenty minutes. But the horse was
about  to fall from exhaustion and so I stopped  for  twenty  minutes. I was
certain now that the Reds were not  going to get me that night. The moon had
disappeared behind  clouds  and  a  morning fog  indicated that I was near a
river. My body was aching and the bump on my head was swelling.  I stretched
out on the ground and heard ahead of me the sound of wagon wheels. "Come on,
old friend," I said to my horse, "one more effort and we are home free." The
horse,  Kochevoi, sensed our friends  were near. He let  out  a whinny  that
could  be heard  for  miles.  A half hour  later, I  was with  my column. By
morning we  had reached the stanitza of IIinskaya, our next stop  on the Don
road. I was worried, as I presented myself to the headquarters staff, that I
might  have  been needed during the night to transmit an  order  to  General
Markov. There had been nothing. I had not been missed.
     Our march  was difficult, slowed  down by the  necessity of pulling the
supply  wagons,  by the civilians  who  accompanied  us, and by the wounded.
Since  we were always on the move,  the wounded  could not be properly cared
for, and even  slight wounds, easily cured in normal circumstances, could be
fatal.
     In view of the desperate situation, our command decided  to  leave  the
wounded  behind in Diadkovskaya. At  the  same time they freed  a communist,
Polouian,  with  great ceremony and asked him to watch out  for them. I said
farewell to the wounded sorrowfully.
     Finally, we reached the  large stanitza of Ourpenskaya, which was  near
the government seat of Stavropol. This was  not  a Cossack  city and many of
its men had  joined the Red  Army. General Denikine  received the news  that
many Cossacks had risen  against the Reds and were  ready to  join  us.  Two
regiments of Kuban Cossacks arrived. Our situation now seemed a bit hopeful.
Denikine decided to march  to the Don and soon our  army  was settled in the
two Don Cossack stanitzas, Olguiskaya and Metchetins-kaya.
     The Cossacks of these towns had fought hard against the Reds. They  had
removed  all  the  tracks  that  connected  the  Rostov-on-the-Don  to   the
Ekaterinodar-Tzarizino line.  We  arrived on the eve  of  Easter and for the
first time in a very long while we had time to celebrate in style.
     During the  next  month  we received reinforcements. The situation  was
looking more favorable. All over  the immense empire, groups  like ours were
forming. Denikine decided  to  leave the Don and set out on  the conquest of
the Kuban. It was May, a beautiful month in southern Russia. Our army of ten
thousand  fighting men started out on the return trip to Kuban. We were glad
to get  away from  the Bolsheviks,  at least those in the northern Caucasus.
Soon we lost our legendary general, Sergei Leoniko-vich Markov, a tragedy to
us. It happened after we had captured the railroad station of Chablievskaya,
on the Novorossisk-Tzarizino line. The  battle was virtually over when I saw
the general  walking between two warehouses. He returned  my salute, visibly
delighted at this first victory that cut off the Reds from the east. At that
moment, a  Red shell, fired  by the armored train as it retreated,  exploded
over his head. He died almost immediately. The deaths first of Kornilov then
of Markov changed the course of our destiny. Even so, I think that there was
never  such  a small army, almost without resources,  that accomplished such
exploits  against  an  enemy  infinitely  superior   in  numbers,  arms  and
munitions.
     A  few  days  after the  death of General  Markov, I  was almost killed
during  the  attack  on  the  Red  infantry  at  the  railroad  junction  of
Tichoretskaya. But we captured Tichoretskaya and that opened up the roads to
Rostov-on-the-Don  and  Ekaterinodar  and  to  the  southern  Caucasus.  The
Bolsheviks  had  to  abandon  an  enormous  amount  of  materiel,  which  we
recovered: two armored trains with their battleship guns, hundreds of wagons
loaded  with ammunition,  and  many  other  supplies. The  victory  also had
political significance. It demonstrated our strength to  the population, and
encouraged  those who, even though they hated  the  Reds, had feared to join
us. The arrival of our  army in Cossack territory and our victories  against
the Reds  had  an  immediate result. Everywhere the Cossack  stanitzas  rose
against  the Communists  and  our  army mushroomed.  Day and  night, Cossack
detachments arrived to join us.
     General Pokrovsky was  still in  disgrace for having accepted promotion
by  the  Ataman Filimonov. He  was  biding  his time.  As great  numbers  of
Cossacks  began to  join us, there was  a need  for a  man like Pokrovsky to
command. When he was named commander of  the Cossacks, he asked me to be his
aide-de-camp,  but I chose to  join a Cossack  detachment serving under  him
that was commanded by one of my uncles.
     Pokrovsky was pitiless with both the Red soldiers and civilians.  After
we  captured Timochevskaya,  the people  as  usual  denounced  the Bolshevik
sympathizers, who were  mostly peasants from the  interior.  He  had  twenty
gallows built  and placed in a circle in the main plaza. One stood apart. It
was for an officer who had been conscripted by the Reds but who had declared
his intention to rejoin our side. When the  Reds retreated,  he had remained
behind and hidden  himself. Pokrovsky had him hanged anyhow. Practically all
captured officers  were hanged. To escape,  it  was not enough to plead that
one had been forced into service. One had to prove that he had acted against
the Reds.
     On August  2, 1918,  a memorable date for me,  we entered  Ekaterinodar
once again  after  six months' absence. Most  of the people gave  us  a wild
welcome. As we marched down the streets they shook our hands and invited the
officers to dinner. After this, I  received three days'  leave  to go see my
family. I had had no news of them for several months, and I was apprehensive
as  I approached home. I was overjoyed to find my mother and younger brother
well. They  had heard from a Cossack who had seen me in  Ekaterinodar that I
was safe and sound. During the three days we spent  together, my mother told
me about  life  under the Bolsheviks. Many  of our belongings  and household
goods had been requisitioned. The Reds had taken all my father's small arms,
and even a pair of binoculars he had won in a pistol competition. As he took
them, the  soldier told my  mother that they would be  useful in helping aim
the cannons against us as we attacked. The essence of civil war is irony: my
father's binoculars might have helped kill me.
     My  mother had not  been badly harassed, though  my  seventeen-year-old
brother had been arrested. But he had soon been released after some peasants
my mother had once helped intervened.  Leaving them was terribly painful. If
I  had realized that I  would end up fighting in  a civil war, I would never
have Joined the army.  Now it  was  too late. "Long farewells  bring useless
tears," says  the  Russian proverb. I got on  my horse and  galloped away to
hide my tears.
     My regiment was already far away and it took me three days  to catch up
with it. The rout of the Reds  was complete in the northern Caucasus. Cities
and  stanitzas fell to us one after another.  Kuban Cossacks,  officers, and
even soldiers whom  the  Bolsheviks had not  succeeded in converting, flowed
into our ranks. We were now one hundred  thousand strong.  Young as I was, I
knew the czarist regime was dead and that Russia needed serious reform -- but
why must neighbors kill  each other, destroy their  farms and livestock, and
raze their homes?
        5. Farewell Mother Russia
     IT is NOT MY  INTENTION to record the history of the Russian Civil War;
that has already been done many  times. I  have recorded these reminiscences
of  my youth  so that my later  adventures  will be  understandable. For two
years I fought in  numerous battles, was  wounded, had four horses shot from
under me, and was lucky enough to survive.
     Without pretending  to be a historian,  I would like to suggest why the
Army of Volunteers, as we were called, fell short of  total victory over the
Bolsheviks,  even  though our  victories brought us very close to Moscow. We
were  so  few. We  had  subdued  an immense territory,  populated by tens of
millions,  but our rear  was  always  exposed  and could  furnish us with no
reserves. The orders  for general mobilization  were ignored. Those who were
drafted hid in the forests.
     Because we had  no real  supply system to speak of, we had  to live off
the population and we made enemies of the people everywhere. If my horse was
killed, I had to replace it by requisitioning one from someone who had until
then sympathized with us.
     The situation with clothing was even worse. For two years I  was issued
absolutely  nothing,  and  to avoid  being  eaten  alive by lice,  I had  to
requisition whatever I needed from the populace.
     The  government of  the  volunteer  army issued its  own  money, called
kolokoltchiki,  but  it  wasn't  worth the  paper  it  was  printed  on. The
population of the conquered areas accepted  it only when they had no choice.
It  is clear why our presence  was not always welcome,  especially since our
victims were  usually  from  among the  less  well  off. The  privileged had
connections  and they  could make things hard for  us  if  we bothered them.
People who owed their lives to us would complain to  the high  command about
the smallest requisitions.
     Lenin, among others, recognized  the  real reason  why we  and  all the
White armies -- those  of Kolchak, Deni-kine, loudenitch, and later Wrangel --
were defeated. So long as  our  armies were made  up of volunteers  who were
enemies of  Bolshevism,  everything  was  all  right.  But  when we  had  to
conscript  the  peasants  and   our  Red  prisoners,  our  situation  became
vulnerable.
     After coming so close to  victory, the volunteer army  gave way  before
the avalanche of the Red forces and their partisans behind our lines. We had
few  munitions  and  weapons,  and  the  Allied powers  gave us  practically
nothing. After  the French sailors at  Odessa mutinied, the Allies were only
confirmed in their desire to get out  of  Russia, where their soldiers might
be contaminated by the new ideology.
     We  could see that the end of Denikine's army was near. I wanted to say
what I thought might be a last good-bye to my mother. When I arrived home, I
was  upset to  learn that my  brother  had enlisted in  the  guard  regiment
commanded by my uncle. I had hoped he would stay home to care for my mother.
The previous year he had enlisted in another regiment,  but  I had asked the
commander to  send him home,  since he was a  minor and had enlisted without
our mother's consent. He had returned, but, as with me, his whole background
pressed him into the fight.
     Our  house was full of refugees, mostly Don Cossacks who  had abandoned
all  their  possessions so  as not to fall into the hands of the Reds. On my
last  night  home, I  invited a few  friends and a  good accordionist and we
spent  the  evening dancing.  About l A.M. some Cossacks from  our  stanitza
knocked on  the door. "Lieutenant," one  of  them  said, "the  Reds are only
twelve  miles away. They'll be here  by  morning. You must leave right away.
They'll kill you if they find you here."
     One of them saddled my horse. Six cavalrymen  from my regiment had come
for me.  They had been  with me for  more  than a year, since my  last visit
home.  As I led the horse to the courtyard  gate, my  mother walked with me.
She  looked at  me for  a long time  and  then blessed me. I kissed  her and
leaped on my horse  so as not to prolong the scene, and galloped off with my
Cossacks. Nobody said a word. We had all been through the same drama.
     We rode all  night in the  direction of Ekaterinodar. The next day, all
the roads leading to the city were  clogged with refugees and  soldiers. The
city  was unrecognizable. It had been very clean, even  pretty.  Now it  was
filthy, crowded with men and horses, and  there were drunks everywhere.  Our
soldiers had pillaged the State-owned vodka factory and everyone, it seemed,
had a  bottle. I had  no idea where  to find our regiment,  so I decided  to
press on toward  the Black Sea, because  I knew that in case of  retreat our
division would go to  Touapse.  I said good-bye  to my friends.  No one knew
what the future would be.
     We practically had to fight our way  across the railroad bridge,  which
was the only way  out of Ekaterinodar  in the  direction of  the  mountains.
Toward evening we arrived at a large tobacco plant that belonged to a Greek.
Some girls who worked  in the  tobacco curing houses  lived in  one  of  the
buildings. We asked if  we  could spend the night with them. I fell madly in
love with one of them, a marvelously beautiful young woman. Our idyll lasted
only the night and we parted the next morning with breaking hearts.
     When I got to Touapse, I learned  that my  regiment had already  passed
through,  moving  toward  the  Georgia  border.  Georgia  had  declared  its
independence from Russia. I caught up with it at Adier, a  tiny and charming
village beyond Sotchi.
     General Rasstegaev, who commanded my regiment,  told me that it was now
part  of a cavalry  brigade of which he  was to take command. He made me his
adjutant  because  I  was  good at  writing  reports  and  orders.  But  the
appointment  was  meaningless; a  few days later the  brigade  had ceased to
exist.
     The mountain forests surrounding us were filled with Red partisans, the
"Greens," who attacked continuously,  while the Qth Red Army pressed us from
the coast. Our Cossacks were increasingly demoralized.
     Now,  we were ordered to Georgia, where we  would certainly be disarmed
and  interned  according to international law. The brigade was assembled and
the  order given to move  toward the border, a  few miles away.  The general
turned  his head only to discover that  half the brigade had not budged.  He
galloped back, with me following.
     "What  are you doing here? Didn't you hear  my  orders?" he  shouted at
them.  The  general  began  to  curse  them,   castigating  them  for  their
disobedience. It was  a dangerous game to provoke three hundred Cossacks who
were afraid of nothing or nobody.
     The only officer with them was a young  lieutenant, a  good  friend  of
mine. At last he came forward  and saluted  his commander. "General, we have
decided not to  go to  Georgia. We prefer to wait here and  surrender to the
Red Army."
     The  general's face turned  crimson.  Without a word, he wheeled on his
horse, rode over to those who had followed him,  and ordered them to  return
to their  lodgings.  I knew that he was deeply  humiliated. Not only had the
Cossacks refused to obey him, but the  lieutenant and at least fifty of them
were from his own stanitza.
     An hour later, a cargo ship dropped anchor a good way from shore; Adier
had  no harbor. The  sea was very  rough,  and a small boat lowered from the
ship had a terrible time getting to shore.
     I went out to meet the landing party and asked what they  had come for.
The ship's second officer replied that they had been sent to pick up as many
men as possible and take  them  to the Crimea.  "But,"  he added, "we cannot
take any  horses. We  have  no  way of  loading them,  and besides,  we  are
anchored practically in the open sea."
     The general  asked his Cossacks whether they  would agree to embark for
the Crimea without their  horses. Their answer  was immediate and unanimous;
they  would rather go to  Georgia. At that point, the general made a mistake
that cost him his command and his commission.
     Overwhelmed  by  betrayal, he  wanted  only  to  get  away as  soon  as
possible.
     "Pity, I shall leave alone, and you will accompany me," he said to  me,
"but I absolutely  demand that they take our  horses." He  explained  to the
second  officer  that they  were thoroughbreds that could not be left to the
Bolsheviks. The officer agreed but only at our  own risk. It took five hours
to get the horses on board, and they were  so  frightened and exhausted that
they took a week to recover.
     When we arrived at Theodosia, an ancient city founded by the Greeks, we
presented ourselves  to General Babiev, commander  of the  Cossack division.
Shortly  afterward,  Rasstegaev  was  dismissed  for  having  abandoned  his
Cossacks.  (I saw him years later in Paris, singing for tips in a cabaret. I
was  too embarrassed  to  speak  to  him.) I  was sent to  the  famous  Wolf
regiment,  which  had  been  established  during  the  Civil  War by General
Schkouro.  I was  not held in blame,  since it was assumed that I had had to
follow the general's orders. A few days later, most of the Cossacks still at
Adier were evacuated to  Theodosia  without their horses. Those who did  not
follow the general were conscripted into the Red Army.
     Without their horses, the Cossacks had lost  their  souls. Fortunately,
new mounts were found for them two months later. General Denikine was forced
to resign his command. The head  of the new "Russian Army" was General Piotr
Nikolaevitch, Baron  Wrangel. A  very  cultivated man, he  had been a mining
engineer  before becoming a  soldier, and had studied  at the famous Nicolas
Cavalry School  at St. Petersburg and later at the War College, where he had
finished first in his class. During World War I he had won  the Cross of St.
George  for  having  captured a German battery at  the head of his squadron.
During  the  Civil War  he commanded  the  Cossack  divisions and  was  very
popular. He was the most liberal  of all our generals and the  most hated by
the Bolsheviks, who called him the "Black Baron." They judged correctly that
his  very  liberalism made  him the most  dangerous of their enemies.  Alone
among the White generals, he  had a program for the future of Russia, if his
troops  should be victorious. He  abolished reprisals against Red  prisoners
and forbade requisitions  from the civilian population. But he had  come  to
command too late, and he knew it.
     Immediately  after  he  took  command,  he began  to work out plans  to
evacuate  the troops abroad in case of defeat. He made arrangements with the
French government, the only foreign power that recognized his authority.
     Although he took  the precaution of planning for a possible evacuation,
Wrangel was not a man to give up without a fight. His  plan was to break out
of the  peninsula and  try  to incite  an  insurrection while the Reds  were
having  trouble  on  the Polish front.  But  his  calculations  left out one
essential consideration: the Russian people  could  not forgive  Wrangel for
his foreign family alliances.
     During  this new brief war, I  had another  proof  of  my extraordinary
luck. Early in May of 1920, a week before  our army broke out of the Crimea,
I had been in the  trenches with  my  regiment, facing  the  Red  lines. One
morning, the commander  had ordered me to take a few Cossacks that night and
try to capture prisoners.
     Between our lines and  the  Reds there  was a wide  no-man's-land where
there were nightly  skirmishes between reconnaisance parties.  I chose a few
Cossacks whom I knew to be adept at this kind of operation and we worked out
a plan. To kill  time  during the afternoon,  as we waited, I  played  a few
hands of cards and won quite a lot of money.  By evening, however, I was ill
with  chills and a high fever. When it was time  to set out, I was running a
temperature of 104.  I  could  not  possibly go  on  such a mission. Another
officer went in my place. In the morning we learned  that  the reconnaisance
party had fallen into an ambush and no one had returned.
     My illness was diagnosed  as typhus.  It left me  completely exhausted;
nonetheless, it had saved my life. I was
     sent away for a month's convalescence, and then repined my regiment.
     When General Wrangel realized that his offensive against  the  superior
Red  forces  was doomed, he  took a long shot. That  was when he decided  to
invade part of  the Kuban Cossack territory, hoping to  stir the  population
against the Bolsheviks, of whom they had, by this time, some experience. His
hopes were illusory. This was the  last offensive of the White Army -- and it
was the battle that claimed the life of my younger brother.
     Only  the Cossack regiments  were to invade Kuban from the coast of the
Azov Sea,  but our preparations were apparently known to the  Reds  well  in
advance.   The   landing  was   to   take  place   near   the  stanitza   of
Primorsko-Akcht