Ishshkushtvennyj intellekt
(konspekt lekcij dlya Svety)
LEKCIYA 4. MASHINY S KVADRATNYMI KOLESAMI
Na Mashine T'yuringa daleko ne uedesh'.
(pripisyvayut |. Postu)
Provalilsya yaponskij proekt "Vyzov", kotoryj obeshchal k 90-mu godu mashiny
pyatogo pokoleniya i, kak sledstvie, absolyutnoe dominirovanie nad prochim
mirom. Rukovoditel' proekta Moto-oka ne dozhil do 90-go goda, poetomu
molchalivyj vopros vezhlivoj yaponskoj obshchestvennosti o harakiri otpal sam
soboj. Spasiba! Pazal'sta! (I poklon).
...
... Upomyanem i
samoe "neopisuemoe" procedurnoe znanie - ezdu na velosipede.
. . .
A na figa?!
(A. Voznesenskij)
Pervoj mysl'yu mashiny, vidimo, byla mysl': "A na figa mne eto vse
nado?".
. . .
LEKCIYA 5. IZVLECHENIE ZNANIJ
Kinos'emka napominaet banyu.
Moesh'sya, a tut prihodit ekskursiya...
(Faina Ranevskaya)
Samoe trudnoe - eto ne razmestit' v mashine znaniya, a izvlech' ih "iz
cheloveka". CHtoby bylo, chto razmeshchat' v mashine.
Zdes' dva osnovnyh sluchaya.
1) CHelovek znaet, no ne mozhet tolkom ob'yasnit'.
2) CHelovek ne znaet, chto znaet (tem bolee ne mozhet ob'yasnit').
Ochen' naivno ozhidat', chto eto mozhno sdelat' s pomoshch'yu interv'yu.
Odin avtoslesar' proizvel na menya v yunosti (togda uchenika avtoslesarya)
neizgladimoe vpechatlenie tem, chto on pochti vse nazyval odnim slovom. I ego
rech' v literaturnom perevode vyglyadela primerno tak: "CHudik, voz'mi etu
chudovinu, i chudni eyu po toj chudovine, chtob chudyaknulas', i neche na menya
chudenki chudovit'. A to chudish', kak chudinishchej chudovnutyj chudilo!". (A dal'she
sledovala druzhelyubnaya, no uzhe absolyutno neperevodimaya fraza
obshchevospitatel'nogo znacheniya).
. . .
Esli vy ne znaete, chto vam nado -
zahodite k nam, u nas eto est'!
(reklama supermarketa)
Odno vremya na zapade sil'no uvleklis' REPERTUARNYMI RESHETKAMI. Kelli
ih ispol'zoval v pyatidesyatye gody dlya vyyavleniya mira dushevnobol'nyh. A
sejchas, v rezul'tate progressa, eti reshetki uzhe vsem vporu. |to ustanovili
specialisty po II i posvyatili etomu, i konferencii i tematicheskie vypuski
svoih zhurnalov.
. . .
YUridicheskoe lico obernulosya
fizicheskoj mordoj.
(sovremennaya skazka)
Izvestna shutka o tom, chto srednyaya temperatura pacientov bol'nicy malo,
chto harakterizuet. Vsyakie srednevzveshennye i dazhe matematicheskoe ozhidanie
temperatury bol'nyh malo, chto govorit o "graduse" lechebnogo dela. CHernoff
predlozhil ispol'zovat' chelovecheskoe lico dlya integral'nyh ocenok.
|to avtoportret.
+---------+ Sovokupnost' otdel'nyh parametrov (v dannom sluchae
| ||||| | simvolov iz qwerty-nabora) - nekij celostnyj obraz.
| | Zdes' mozhno odnovremenno otrazhat' izmenenie otdel'nyh
| [ ^ ^ ] | parametrov i izmenenie fizionomii celikom, ne
| ^ | zanimayas' "integrirovaniem", no poluchaya obobshchennuyu
| ^/ | ocenku.
| | ||||| /////
+---sae---+
[ o o ] [ / / ]
^ /
O/ ==/
udivilsya ushel v sebya
. . .
Kogda vladel'cem znaka stanovitsya komp'yuter, to eto dobavlyaet emu
golovnoj boli v ponimanii nas, poskol'ku u nas vse ne kak u komp'yuterov.
Znakomoe slovo SINONIMIYA po-nauchnomu oznachaet situaciyu, kogda neskol'ko
znakov imeyut odin koncept i odin denotat. Naprimer, "partiya - Lenin",
"sokol - ZHirinovskij", "predprinimatel' - voryuga, kotoromu davno mesto v
tyur'me, a ne v kabake s devkami, kotorym tozhe davno mesto ne v kabake".
Nekotorye vzdragivayut o drugogo vpolne prilichnogo slova OMONIMIYA. |to
vsego lish', kogda u odnogo znaka neskol'ko par koncept-denotat. K
hrestomatijnomu: "Zakroj zamok na zamok, chtoby zamok ne zamok" dobavlyu
"Kosaya devushka s kosoj kosoj kosila na kose koso". Vot pust' mashina i
razbiraetsya, esli ne okoseet...
. . .
Informaciya k razmyshleniyu.
(YU.Semenov)
Glavnaya mistifikaciya informacionnogo veka - eto SHennonovskaya TEORIYA
INFORMACII, kotoraya, v dejstvitel'nosti, ne zanimaetsya teoriej informacii.
Ona zanimaetsya lish' izmereniem KOLICHESTVA INFORMACII.
Esli v kachestve harakteristiki nekoego Sobraniya Sochinenij vydavat'
kilogrammy i kolichestvo, to mozhno zaprosto uravnovesit' eto delo seledkami
ili utyugami.
. . .
Kolichestvo informacii proporcional'no umen'sheniyu entropii, Znachit,
esli ya v kachestve informacii peredayu DEZINFORMACIYU, to ya u_v_e_l_ch_i_v_a_yu
entropiyu. Spravedlivost' trebuet, chtoby set' mne za eto platila!
. . .
Slava tebe, Gospodi,
chto ty sozdal vse nuzhnoe netrudnym,
a vse trudnoe - nenuzhnym.
(G.S.Skovoroda, 1722-1792)
Znaniya nado ne tol'ko izvlech', no i formalizovat'. A to ih komp'yuter
ne primet. Komp'yuter, v konechnom schete, samoe zaformalizovannoe sozdanie.
Do nolikov-edinichek zaformalizovan. A dal'she nekuda - men'she bita eshche
nichego ne pridumali. A chelovek naoborot - iz zhivotnyh samyj
neformalizovannyj. Tak vot, formalizaciya neformalizovannogo - process
neformalizuemyj. Hotya s etim pytayutsya borot'sya logiki i voennye.
. . .
LEKCIYA 6. MATEMATICHESKIE STRADANIYA
Esli "algoriTm", to "ariTmetika".
(eto logichno)
. . .
|to tol'ko naivnyj yunosha,
"obdumyvayushchij zhit'e", schitaet, chto teoriya algoritmov nauchit ego
razrabatyvat' algoritmy. Potrativ luchshie gody svoej zhizni on obnaruzhivaet,
chto teoriya algoritmov etim voobshche ne zanimaetsya.
. . .
YA myslyu - znachit sushchestvuyu!
(Rodenovskij myslitel')
Logika byla pridumana, chtoby zamenit' cheloveka, poetomu otnoshenie k
nej bylo nastorozhennoe eshche so vremen Aristotelya, kotoryj zanimalsya
sillogizmami tipa:
"Vse lyudi smertny".
"Aristotel' - chelovek".
"Sledovatel'no, Aristotel' smerten".
I umer-taki, v silu logicheskoj neobhodimosti.
On byl pervym. Za nim sledom umerli i mnogie drugie, ostaviv mnogo
raznyh logik. Samaya netrivial'naya, konechno, zhenskaya logika, hotya
matematiki zdes' ni pri chem (i dazhe pokojnaya Sof'ya Kovalevskaya).
. . .
YA - lgu!
(istina)
Viner dal opredelenie ponyatiyu INFORMACIYA: "Informaciya - eto
informaciya, a NE materiya i NE energiya". I vse!
Otricaniya vokrug nas. Ih mnogo i oni raznye. Izvestno, chto otricanij
bol'she, chem utverzhdenij! "Tak naprimer, utverzhdenie: "Krasnyj nos", eto
slozhnoe utverzhdenie, sostoyashchee iz bol'shogo kolichestva elementarnyh: "NE
oranzhevyj nos", "NE zheltyj nos", "NE zelenyj nos" i t.d.
. . .
2 + 2 = 4
(inoplanetyanin)
. . .
No ved' kak-to chelovek, vse-taki, dumaet...
-$-
sae
+ Origin: Gated from Relcom by Palantiri NewsGate (2:5030/27.0)
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* Origin: I budu ya moskovskim habom, podruga vernaya moya (romans) (2:5020/35.1)
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Msg : 19 of 37 K/s
From : Dmitry Zavalishin 2:5020/32 11 Mar 94 17:02:24
To : All 12 Mar 94 01:01:34
Subj : Zone 7 - Russia
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Hello All.
I think, this message from area R50.SYSOP seems to be interesting:
--------------------------- Start Cut -------------------------
From : Kirill Lebedev, 2:5020/251 (11 Mar 94 10:56)
To : Mike Shoyher
Subj : Zone 7 - Russia
---------------------------------------------------------------
Hello Mike,
09 Mar 94 07:52, Mike Shoyher wrote to Dmitry Zavalishin:
M> Dim, pover' mne, ya ne samyj tupoj sisop. I real'no ya ocenivayu slozhnost'
M> perenaladki tol'ko svoego klastera ~1 nedelya.
%-/
PXESSA iz 7 chastej "Perehod Sisopa v 7uyu zonu".
Den' pervyj:
Dejstvuyushchie lica: Sisop sonnyj( s P.Pryazhencevym ne putat'!) - 1sht.
Sonnyj sisop prodiraet glaza posle nochi, opyat' provedennoj za komp'yuterom.
Laskovye luchi solnca zaglyadyvayut v okoshko, i sisop dumaet pro sebya: "Kakaya
pogoda! Schas by gulyat' pojti...". No vdrug lico sisopa nachinaet menyat'sya...
SHCHeki, byvshie neskol'ko sekund nazad rozovymi, proglyadyvayushchimi dazhe iz-za spiny,
vdrug prinimayut pepel'no-seryj cvet i otvisayut... Iz pod chernyh volos
probivaetsya vse bol'she i bol'she sedyh... Ne prohodit 5ti minut, kak sisop sidit
ves' sedoj. Na ego lice prostupaet zloradnaya ulybka, bolee pohozhaya na
predsmertnyj oskal, on vspominaet, chto segodnya nachinaetsya perehod v sed'muyu
zonu... On podhodit k komp'yuteru, i... (CHto proishodilo s sisopom dal'she,
opisaniyu ne podlezhit.) Ego tryaslo, dergalo iz storony v storonu, da tak, chto on
ne mog ponyat', gde pol, a gde potolok. On othodil ot komp'yutera, uspokaivalsya i
snova s golovoj brosalsya v stihiyu. No tol'ko stoilo smenit' cifru 2 na 7 - ego
moshchnym tolchkom otbrasyvalo ot komp'yutera. Za 17 chasov smertel'noj bor'by on
smenil cifru v TREH mestah. |to bylo uzhe poldela. No sisop uzhe ne mog dazhe
stoyat' na nogah. On prikryl glaza, i usnul. I snilas' emu bol'shaya bol'shaya bochka
s pivom, upravlyaemaya s kompa cherez modem... Esli by kto-nibud' uvidel siospa v
etot moment, to tochno podumal by, chto eto murlykayushchij kotenok, takoe bylo
vyrazhenie lica u nego. Schastlivyj, on spal.
Den' vtoroj, tretij, chetvertyj, pyatyj byli kak dve kapli vody pohozhi na pervyj.
Den' shestoj:
Za shest' dnej bor'by sisop priobrel bol'shoj opyt. Teper' on uzhe ne srazu nachinal
pravit' konfigi, a snachala zalival v shchel' diskovoda 5-6 butylok piva. Kogda zhe
komp'yuter nachinal ikat', sisop svyazyval komputer shnurami pitaniya, obmatyval
telefonnym kabelem, i nachinal svoe delo. Komp'yuter izdaval takoj rev, chto sosedi
dumali o tom, kakoj strashnoj smert'yu v etoj kvartire umiraet slon uzhe 6oj den'
podryad. Dvazhdy priezzhala miliciya, no ponyav, chto oni nichego ne ponimayut, menty
uezzhali, ne zabyv pozvonit' v psih. kliniku. No sisop byl ne na stol'ko glup,
chto-by prikidyvat'sya psihom. Psihi(kodovoe nazvanie PSIHIATR OBYKNOVENNYJ, Homo
psyhicus :) uezzhali ni s chem.
Vremya shlo... Sisop pochuvstvoval, chto priblizhaetsya k zavetnoj cherte - izmeneniyu
Main adrress'a. On prinyal dlya hrabrosti, potom eshche, potom eshche...
Den' sed'moj:
Nautro golova raskalyvalas'. No stoilo emu uvidet' 2: v majn adrese - pohmel'e
kak rukoj snyalo. Komp'yuter tozhe byl gotov k oborone: monitor izluchal
rentgenovskie luchi; telefonnyj kabel' zhalilsya dvumyastami vol'tami; shel' ot
diskovoda tak i norovila ukusit' za palec; modem sverkal svoimi lampochkami tak,
chto v glazah ostavalis' bliki... Obluchennyj sisop, uzhe lyseyushchij, sobiraetsya s
silami i kidaetsya na komp'yuter. (Golos svyshe: on eshche ne znaet o tom, chto eto ego
poslednyaya ataka). Idet bor'ba, vsya rech' iz kotoroj vyrezana cenzuroj. Sisop
delaet usilie, i VOT!!!! On dobilsya celi!!! Main Address teper' nachinaetsya s
cifry 7:. On chut' oslablyaet hvatku, i tut zhe chuvstvuet, chto na shee nachinaet
zatyagivat'sya shnur ot RS-232. Sisop bolee ne v sostoyanii borot'sya, opuskaet ruki,
nachinaet hripet'... Zabyvaetsya.
Den' vos'moj, on zhe pervyj:
"Siopushka, vstavaj!"- skazal ZyXEL na vsyu komnatu, i sisop prosypayas' ponimaet,
chto on zhiv, i vse eto byl strashnyj son.
Laskovoe solnyshko luchami shchekochet sisopa, no emu tak neohota vstavat'!!! On
sobiraet vse svoi ostatki voli, podhodit k komp'yuteru, i
... vyklyuchaet ego! "DA PROPADI TY PROPADOM, ZONA 7!" - vosklicaet on. Luchshe ya
pojdu pop'yu piva! Bol'she etogo sisopa v setyah elektronnoj pochty nikto i nikogda
ne videl.
With best regards,
Kirill A.Lebedev
^-^
$ MolchiGin: SH²±°Swan's Lake/2°±²SH23:30-06:30SH²±°ZyXEL°±²SH (2:5020/251)
--------------------------- Final Cut -------------------------
Dmitry
---
* Origin: Silent Infinity Surrounds Your Mind (2:5020/32)
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Msg : 22 of 37 K/s
From : Mikel Lavrentyev 2:5020/35.1 12 Mar 94 16:19:02
To : All 12 Mar 94 19:13:26
Subj : . vot dlya HUMOR.FILTERED
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* Forwarded by Mikel Lavrentyev (2:5020/35.1)
* Area : netmail (*****: netmail (main))
* From : Dmitry Anisimov, 2:5020/139.18 (22 Feb 94 09:47)
* To : Mikel Lavrentyev, 5020/35.1
* Subj : A vot dlya HUMOR.FILTERED
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Privet, Mikel!
Subj : 4 h.f. - SHkol'nye tradicii
V>>>> V ka zhdom institute est' sobstvennye "lyubimye" prepodavateli
V>>>> pro katoryh rasskazyvayut anekdoty. Esli ih kto-to pomnit, -
V>>>> opublikujte
SM>> Moj staryj drug do sih por berezhno hranit svoj shkol'nyj
SM>> dnevnik s zapis'yu zamechaniya: "CHital na uroke literatury"
ML> Let 10 nazad moih druzej shtrafanuli za to, chto oni sdelali chto-to tipa
ML> modema i nachali shipet' v telefonnuyu liniyu. Na kvitancii shtrafa bylo
ML> napisano : "Za ispol'zovanie telefonnoj linii v kachestve linii svyazi". :-)
A vot u nas byla uchitel'nica biologii. Zamechatel'nyj chelovek, no ee perly
sobirali v techenie mnogih let, u menya gde-to valyaetsya sbornichek s odnogo leta,
kogda ona byla so shkol'nikami s LTO. Najdu - kinu, a poka po pamyati ee shedever:
Zapisi v dnevnike: "Pronik v shkolu cherez zadnij prohod" (chernyj hod)
"Strelyal na uroke, byl solidaren s sosedom" (prichem eto ona
napisala dvum druz'yam, sidevshim ryadom, kazhdomu slovo v slovo s izmeneniem tol'ko
familij)
"Igral chasami na uroke" (prosto pishchal elektronnymi)
A odnazhdy moj odnoklassnik prines pishchalku, govorivshuyu "Mama" (iz kukly vytashchil)
I kogda on na uroke ee dostal i po klassu poshel istoshnyj krik "MAMA", A.I.
sprosila so strogim licom: "Pust' vstanet uchenik, tvoryashchij chudo."
A lichno mne na uroke peniya vo vtorom klasse uchitel'nica napisala: "Plevalsya na
uroke peniya. Roditeli, ob®yasnite emu, chto on chelovek!" A my togda iz trubok
zhevanoj bumagoj drug v druga strelyali.
Best regards, Dmitry.
> Befuddled PC Users Flood Help Lines, And No Question Seems
> to Be Too Basic
>
> By JIM CARLTON Staff Reporter of THE WALL STREET JOURNAL
>
> AUSTIN, Texas - The exasperated help-line caller said
> she couldn't get her new Dell computer to turn on. Jay
> Alblinger, a Dell Computer Corp. technician, made sure the
> computer was plugged in and then asked the woman what
> happened when she pushed the power button.
>
> "I've pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing
> happens," the woman replied. "Foot pedal?" the technician
> asked. "Yes," the woman said, "this little white foot pedal
> with the on switch."
>
> The "foot pedal," it turned out, was the computer's mouse, a
> hand-operated device that helps to control the computer's
> operations.
>
> Personal-computer makers are discovering that it's still a
> low-tech world out there. While they are finally having
> great success selling PCs to households, they now have to
> deal with people to whom monitors and disk drives are as
> foreign as another language.
>
> "It is rather mystifying to get this nice, beautiful machine
> and not know anything about it,'' says Ed Shuler, a
> technician who helps field consumer calls at Dell's
> headquarters here. "It's going into unfamiliar territory,"
> adds Gus Kolias, vice president of customer service and
> training for Compaq Computer Corp. "People are looking for a
> comfort level."
>
> Only two years ago, most calls to PC help lines came from
> techies needing help on complex problems. But now, with
> computer sales to homes exploding as new "multimedia"
> functions gain mass appeal, PC makers say that as many as
> 70% of their calls come from rank novices. Partly because of
> the volume of calls, some computer companies have started
> charging help-line users.
>
> The questions are often so basic that they could have been
> answered by opening the manual that comes with every
> machine. One woman called Dell's toll-free line to ask how
> to install batteries in her laptop. When told that the
> directions were on the first page of the manual, says Steve
> Smith, Dell's director of technical support, the woman
> replied angrily, "I just paid $2,000 for this damn thing,
> and I'm not going to read a book."
>
> Indeed, it seems that these buyers rarely refer to a manual
> when a phone is at hand. "If there is a book and a phone and
> they're side by side, the phone wins time after time," says
> Craig McQuilkin, manager of service marketing for AST
> Research Inc. in Irvine, Calif. "It's a phenomenon of people
> wanting to talk to people."
>
> And do they ever. Compaq's help center in Houston, Texas, is
> inundated with some 8,000 consumer calls a day, with
> inquiries like this one related by technician John Wolf: "A
> frustrated customer called, who said her brand new Contura
> would not work. She said she had unpacked the unit, plugged
> it in, opened it up and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for
> something to happen. When asked what happened when she
> pressed the power switch, she asked, 'What power switch?' "
>
> Seemingly simple computer features baffle some users. So
> many people have called to ask where the "any" key is when
> "Press Any Key" flashes on the screen that Compaq is
> considering changing the command to "Press Return Key."
>
> Some people can't figure out the mouse. Tamra Engle, an AST
> technical support supervisor, says one customer complained
> that her mouse was hard to control with the "dust cover" on.
> The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was
> packaged in. Dell technician Wayne Zieschang says one of his
> customers held the mouse and pointed it at the screen, all
> the while clicking madly. The customer got no response
> because the mouse works only if it's moved over a flat
> surface.
>
> Disk drives are another bugaboo. Compaq technician Brent
> Sullivan says a customer was having trouble reading
> wordprocessing files from his old diskettes. After
> troubleshooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the
> problem, Mr. Sullivan asked what else was being done with
> the diskette. The customer's response: ''I put a label on
> the diskette, roll it into the typewriter...."
>
> At AST, another customer dutifully complied with a
> technician's request that she send in a copy of a defective
> floppy disk. A letter from the customer arrived a few days
> later, along with a Xerox copy of the floppy. And at Dell, a
> technician advised a customer to put his troubled floppy
> back in the drive and "close the door." Asking the
> technician to "hold on," the customer put the phone down and
> was heard walking over to shut the door to his room. The
> technician meant the door to his floppy drive.
>
> The software inside the computer can be equally befuddling.
> A Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer
> to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the
> technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of
> paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and
> hitting the "send" key.
>
> Another Dell customer needed help setting up a new program,
> so Dell technician Gary Rock referred him to the local
> Egghead. "Yeah, I got me a couple of friends," the customer
> replied. When told Egghead was a software store, the man
> said, "Oh! I thought you meant for me to find a couple of
> geeks."
>
> Not realizing how fragile computers can be, some people end
> up damaging parts beyond repair. A Dell customer called to
> complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned
> it, he said, filling up his tub with soap and water and
> soaking the keyboard for a day, and then removing all the
> keys and washing them individually.
>
> Computers make some people paranoid. A Dell technician,
> Morgan Vergara, says he once calmed a man who became enraged
> because "his computer had told him he was bad and an
> invalid." Mr. Vergara patiently explained that the
> computer's "bad command'' and ''invalid" responses shouldn't
> be taken personally.
>
> These days PC-help technicians increasingly find themselves
> taking on the role of amateur psychologists. Mr. Shuler, the
> Dell technician, who once worked as a psychiatric nurse,
> says he defused a potential domestic fight by soothingly
> talking a man through a computer problem after the man had
> screamed threats at his wife and children in the background.
>
> There are also the lonely hearts who seek out human contact,
> even if it happens to be a computer techie. One man from New
> Hampshire calls Dell every time he experiences a life
> crisis. He gets a technician to walk him through some
> contrived problem with his computer, apparently feeling
> uplifted by the process.
>
> "A lot of people want reassurance," says Mr. Shuler.
>
--------------------------- Final Cut -------------------------
Dmitry
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Msg : 29 of 37 K/s
From : Mikel Lavrentyev 2:5020/35.1 14 Mar 94 00:46:00
To : All 14 Mar 94 07:08:02
Subj : Universal Disclaimer
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* Forwarded by Mikel Lavrentyev (2:5020/35.1)
* Area : netmail (*****: netmail (main))
* From : Harry Bush, 2:51/2 (13 Mar 94 18:41)
* To : Mikel Lavrentyev, 5020/35.1
* Subj : Universal Disclaimer
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* Originally to 2:5020/35
Hello Mikel!
For Humor.Filtered if you like it :-)
Best wishes, Harry
Sunday March 13 1994 17:10
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
UNIVERSAL DISCLAIMER
This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to
real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where
prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank
number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment.
Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not
use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be
paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to
sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for
some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For
recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age.
If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable
parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to
change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage
necessary if mailed in the United States. Breaking seal constitutes
acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size
fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substaintial amount of
non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may, in time, fade. We have sent the
forms which seem to be right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use
only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox.
Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will
not deliver without postage. List was current at time of printing.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not
responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages
resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At
participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use.
See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do
not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Your cancelled check is your recipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid
contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is
properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher
west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not
eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some
questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to insure
prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for
this engagement. No purchase necessary. Processed at location stamped
in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only
in well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flame. Replace with
same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here
if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not
include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children.
Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No
solicitors. No alcohol, dogs, or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise
specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two
alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free before
digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned
in this product appear for identification purposes only. Record
additional transactions on back of previous stub.
This supersedes all previous notices.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
-+- GoldEd/2 2.42.G0214+ BT-2.50EE E3-32 OS/2
+ Origin: Harry Bush (Team OS/2) Harry@castle.riga.lv (2:51/2)
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Mikel
--- GoldED 2.42.1219
* Origin: I budu ya moskovskim habom, podruga vernaya moya (romans) (2:5020/35.1)
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Msg : 31 of 37 K/s
From : Dmitry Zavalishin 2:5020/32 14 Mar 94 18:52:46
To : All 15 Mar 94 00:44:16
Subj : .dinyj alfavit!
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Hello All.
I think, this message from area REL.HUMOR seems to be interesting:
--------------------------- Start Cut -------------------------
From : pui@pc03.zgik.zaporizhzhe.ua, 2:5020/128 (13 Mar 94 17:49)
To : All
Subj : Edinyj alfavit!
---------------------------------------------------------------
X-RealName: Pshenichniy Yura
Muzhiki-i-i izvinite, esli kto uzhe chital, no ya ne vyderzhal,
zakrospostil etu statejku.
[ Article crossposted from relcom.comp.sources.d ]
[ Author was Vadim V. Vlasov ]
[ Posted on Mon, 07 Mar 94 15:06:47 +0300 ]
Hi!
K sozhaleniyu, ya propustil samoe nachalo interesnejshej diskussii :-(
Leo A.Dmitriev (leo@aros.kaluga.su) wrote:
> Dmitriev L.A. Edinyj alfavit
> (latinskij alfavit dlya russkogo yazyka)
> SchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchchCH
> ¿ Copyright (c) 1994, L.Dmitriev ¿
> ¿ All rights reserved. ¿
> ZHshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchshchSHCH
[skip]
> 26 bukvami latinskogo alfavita. CHitaya teksty v etoj transkripcii, vy budete
> go- vorit' takzhe, kak russkij uchitel', diktuyushchij uchenikam nachal'nyh klassov.
Odnako, "tak zhe".
[skip]
> Pri chtenii teksta v etoj transkripcii sleduet bez isklyuchenij
> soblyudat' princip: "kak pishem - tak i govorim" ( ne putat' s drugim: "kak
> govorim - tak i pishem"), t.e. proiznositsya tol'ko to, chto napisano,
> sootvetstvenno i pishetsya tol'ko to, chto budet chetko progovarivat'sya.
Kak govoritsya: "Pochuvstvujte raznicu!"
Davnym-davno na olimpiade po yazykovedeniyu i matematike predlagalas' takaya
zadacha (vosproizvozhu po pamyati - mozhet, kto-to podpravit, esli ne tak).
------
V rezul'tate dal'nejshej evolyucii russkogo yazyka odno iz izvestnejshih
stihotvorenij mozhet zazvuchat' tak:
Ma tata, sami sini ravi,
Kata ni suku sanima,
Ja vuvasa sipa satavi
Ji rusi vituma ni ma.
CHto eto za stihotvorenie, i kak ego prodolzhit'.
------
Kto srazu ponyal, chto eto bylo, i oshchutil prelest' "novorusskogo" yazyka, tot
vpolne mozhet perehodit' na latinskij alfavit. Ostal'nym mozhno tol'ko
posochuvstvovat' i predlozhit' uchit' anglijskij, a zaodno i russkij, chtoby ne
bylo takih perevodov: "paging" = "podkachka stranic".
Dal'nejshaya evolyuciya privedet k sokrashcheniyu chisla bukv v alfavite do dvuh:
"1" i "0" (da/net, sootvetstvenno; bukva "chert ego znaet" ne predusmotrena -
"CHelovek Budushchego" ne dolzhen somnevat'sya) i k sootvetstvuyushchemu sokrashcheniyu
chisla knopok na klaviature - krome "1" i "0" ostanutsya eshche Shift (dlya bol'shogo
"DA") i Alt (dlya "da, no ne tuda"). Vozmozhno poyavlenie klaviatury v nozhnom
variante (chtoby osvobodit' ruki dlya bolee vazhnyh del).
V rezul'tate proizojdet sliyanie russkogo, anglijskogo, kitajskogo i pr. yazykov,
ischeznut razlichiya mezhdu umstvennym i fizicheskim trudom (programmisty budut
stuchat' po klaviature nogami), mezhdu gorodom i derevnej (vmesto fermy budet
srazu molokozavod, na kotorom vmesto korovy - odno bol'shoe vymya), mezhdu
muzhchinoj i zhenshchinoj, i nastupit polnyj Kommunizm!
> Edinomu miru - edinyj alfavit!
> Kak pishem - tak i govorim!
Odnako, kak govorim, tak i dumaem. Znachit, esli krivo pishem, to.....
Derzajte! S "Intel'om inside" i MicroSoft'om za pazuhoj - vmeste v XXI vek!
Vadim.
Disclaimer: Ruki rabotayut bystree, chem golova.
Copyright: Estestvenno, moj.
License: Esli vy dochitali eto do konca - s vas 10rub. Esli vy prishlete 100rub.,
to poluchite pravo rasskazyvat' ob etom druz'yam i znakomym. Esli vy prishlete
10000rub., to poluchite krasivo oformlennyj i raspechatannyj vysheprivedennyj
tekst vmeste s chertezhami predpolagaemogo raspolozheniya knopok na klaviature.
Novyj speckurs/specseminar
prof. S.V.Kolupanova i m.n.s. P.O.Bubulinskogo
SIMPILLYACIYA DISTRUBNYH GENTRONOV
nachinaet svoyu rabotu s 4 oktyabrya (posvyashchen 38-letiyu vyhoda
v kosmicheskoe prostranstvo). Speckurs budet prohodit' v
auditorii 16-20 (na kafedre obshchej geometrii i topologii) po
sredam s 16:20.
Znanie simpillyativnyh metodov ne predpolagaetsya.
Rekomenduetsya studentam tret'ego-pyatogo kursa i aspirantam.
Planiruetsya oznakomlenie so sleduyushchimi voprosami:
|lementarnaya gentronnaya stohastika;
Asimptotika distrubnyh i alpha-distrubnyh processov;
Spektral'no-simpillyativnye metody ekstrapolyacii;
Topologicheskie aspekty rezol'vent unitarnyh simpillyatorov;
Algoritmicheskaya paradigma gentronnoj stohastiki;
Kontr- i rekontrprimery distrubnyh kontinuumov;
Kumulyativnye effekty alpha-distrubatora;
Reshenie dvadcat' chetvertoj problemy Dzhilberda;
Last-modified: Mon, 06 Oct 1997 07:15:48 GMT